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| Will this be Dan when he's an old man? |
Sunday, August 28, 2011
Oh Gilbert the Conversationalist!
Dan & I had company over last night. Our company, of course, were introduced to the cats. Gary ran off somewhere whereas Gilbert stayed in the living room sitting in the fabric box, like he was part of the party. He then, later during the evening, came out of his fabric box and sat in the middle of the floor and let out a large, "MEEEOOOW!" Like somehow he was contributing to the conversation. Well, of course, all looked at him and responded to his meow. Most chuckled, I of course encouraged him with a "oh yeah?" Oh Gilbert was tickled. He then proceeded to Dan's lap for snuggles and purrs while everyone looked on commenting on Gilbert being such a good cat. Ha! Gilbert the conversationalist!
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
Take it from Gary - Siestas are Beneficial
This surgery is kicking my butt! I have had 2 surgeries in the past and both of those have not left me this exhausted! Now the pain is tolerable, until I try to sleep at night. Let me explain, I am the type of person that has a preferred way of sleeping and once I am in that position, I will not move all night. For me, this position happens to be my left side. It's quite simple, I lay down, turn over on my side, and sleep. And I sleep very long and very deep. Now this has proven to be a challenge with this surgery because sleeping on my side is extremely uncomfortable and very painful.
Solution: I have been sleeping on our couch in the living room, on my back, with pillow underneath my legs. This has proven to be very uncomfortable, and I have been waking up every 2-3 hours when I unconsciously attempt to roll over on my side! I will then flip back on my back and try to resume sleeping. This has been going on for 2 weeks now.
The cats have been in the living room with me during the night over the past 2 weeks. It appears they are taking turns "watching over me." When I awake, I find either Gary or Gilbert on the back of the couch dozing off and when I move, they wake up to watch what's going on. I found this very touching that these animals care so much about what's going on with me.
Now Gary is a big fan of the cat naps. This little cat, like myself, when he sleeps, he sleeps very deep and usually in the same position the whole time. Gary has an afternoon nap schedule that is strictly followed, even if I or Gilbert try to poke him awake he'll adheres to his schedule. Gary always appears to have energy when he wants it. So, I started following his nap schedule to see if it helped with my energy levels. Why not, I figured. And guess what? It seems to be working. I have been taking a personal "siesta" everyday from 2-4pm or sometimes 3-5pm. Gary starts his a little earlier, usually around 11am. He'll sleep for an hour, then back up until about 2pm and will sleep right until 5 or 6pm. So his personal siestas are a bit longer than mine. lol
These siestas have turned out to be wonderful! Not only do I get to nap in the afternoon, I find that in the evening I am more productive and have longer endurance. Gary seems happy that I have adopted his schedule. He has been more talkative with me, and particularly patient with me when I attempt to bend down to pet him. He has even taken to jumping on the bed or couch when one is close by, so I don't have to bend down to pet him. Isn't that the sweetest thing? He sees how uncomfortable I am and that little cat takes action so I don't have to hurt. What a good boy.
So in conclusion, take a lesson from Gary, the expert napper. Naps are wonderful but the siesta is most important.
For More on Cat Naps
What is a Siesta?
Solution: I have been sleeping on our couch in the living room, on my back, with pillow underneath my legs. This has proven to be very uncomfortable, and I have been waking up every 2-3 hours when I unconsciously attempt to roll over on my side! I will then flip back on my back and try to resume sleeping. This has been going on for 2 weeks now.
The cats have been in the living room with me during the night over the past 2 weeks. It appears they are taking turns "watching over me." When I awake, I find either Gary or Gilbert on the back of the couch dozing off and when I move, they wake up to watch what's going on. I found this very touching that these animals care so much about what's going on with me.
Now Gary is a big fan of the cat naps. This little cat, like myself, when he sleeps, he sleeps very deep and usually in the same position the whole time. Gary has an afternoon nap schedule that is strictly followed, even if I or Gilbert try to poke him awake he'll adheres to his schedule. Gary always appears to have energy when he wants it. So, I started following his nap schedule to see if it helped with my energy levels. Why not, I figured. And guess what? It seems to be working. I have been taking a personal "siesta" everyday from 2-4pm or sometimes 3-5pm. Gary starts his a little earlier, usually around 11am. He'll sleep for an hour, then back up until about 2pm and will sleep right until 5 or 6pm. So his personal siestas are a bit longer than mine. lol
These siestas have turned out to be wonderful! Not only do I get to nap in the afternoon, I find that in the evening I am more productive and have longer endurance. Gary seems happy that I have adopted his schedule. He has been more talkative with me, and particularly patient with me when I attempt to bend down to pet him. He has even taken to jumping on the bed or couch when one is close by, so I don't have to bend down to pet him. Isn't that the sweetest thing? He sees how uncomfortable I am and that little cat takes action so I don't have to hurt. What a good boy.
So in conclusion, take a lesson from Gary, the expert napper. Naps are wonderful but the siesta is most important.
For More on Cat Naps
What is a Siesta?
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Home from hospital, cats are going CRAZY!
Well I guess the Alamo could have sustained Santa Anna's army if they had the right ammo. lol The doctor managed to take out the two masses and save my ovary. He says I will be fully operational with in 6 months! Yay! and we ride off into the sunset.....
I did have to spend 2 days in the hospital because they had to open me up. For some reason they first thought they could do the whole procedure by pulling out plums size cysts through quarter sized holes. But I believe they came to their senses and remembered the goal - save the ovary. Which they did. They said there may be some damage to the Fallopian tube, but it can be fixable if Dan & I ever want to have kids of our own. So I am happy to know the option is there if we ever wanted to. But right now, I think I am just happy to be a functional woman. Yay!
So Gary and Gilbert didn't seem to mind that I was gone for 2 days. But it IS bugging them something awful that I can't bend over to pet them, pick them up, and play with them like I normally do. Gilbert has been very needy. He cuddled with Dan on the couch for a long time. I felt bad because when I got up to go to the kitchen, he came, too. Poor guy looked so comfy on Dan, but he wanted attention from me too. Gary tried to jump on the bed last night to sleep where he normally sleeps, but how I was sleeping I couldn't adjust quick enough to accommodate him and he ended up sleeping on the floor.
I am supposed to be off work for 6 weeks! I am glad most of my work is on front of the computer. But I am not supposed to drive because the incision is right where the seat belt goes. That is going to be frustrating. I can't lift anything over 10 lbs for 6 weeks. So Gary I could probably pick up, but no Gilbert for a while. I am not sure how I am going to manage to get up and down to our 2nd story apartment. I think I may be stuck up here for a few weeks. It was hard walking up the stairs. Maybe I'll pretend I am a princess stuck in a tower waiting for the prince to rescue me. lol I have business appointments next week, which I should have known better to make. So I will have to bump them or encourage to do more over email. It's not like it's A LOT of business, so I could easily accommodate myself I suppose. ::sigh:: I am going to just have to receive company at home if I want company.
This will be completely worth it after this 6 weeks. Well, I hope so. lol We'll see. I hope Gary and Gilbert will be ok with me not picking them up for a while. Dan will have extra cat duties for a while.
So I am glad I am ok, glad the best worked out, and happy to be here. Yay! I am going to make myself a "high fiber" breakfast. The doc ordered "high fiber" everything for now on. So oatmeal it is this morning. Yummy.
I did have to spend 2 days in the hospital because they had to open me up. For some reason they first thought they could do the whole procedure by pulling out plums size cysts through quarter sized holes. But I believe they came to their senses and remembered the goal - save the ovary. Which they did. They said there may be some damage to the Fallopian tube, but it can be fixable if Dan & I ever want to have kids of our own. So I am happy to know the option is there if we ever wanted to. But right now, I think I am just happy to be a functional woman. Yay!
So Gary and Gilbert didn't seem to mind that I was gone for 2 days. But it IS bugging them something awful that I can't bend over to pet them, pick them up, and play with them like I normally do. Gilbert has been very needy. He cuddled with Dan on the couch for a long time. I felt bad because when I got up to go to the kitchen, he came, too. Poor guy looked so comfy on Dan, but he wanted attention from me too. Gary tried to jump on the bed last night to sleep where he normally sleeps, but how I was sleeping I couldn't adjust quick enough to accommodate him and he ended up sleeping on the floor.
I am supposed to be off work for 6 weeks! I am glad most of my work is on front of the computer. But I am not supposed to drive because the incision is right where the seat belt goes. That is going to be frustrating. I can't lift anything over 10 lbs for 6 weeks. So Gary I could probably pick up, but no Gilbert for a while. I am not sure how I am going to manage to get up and down to our 2nd story apartment. I think I may be stuck up here for a few weeks. It was hard walking up the stairs. Maybe I'll pretend I am a princess stuck in a tower waiting for the prince to rescue me. lol I have business appointments next week, which I should have known better to make. So I will have to bump them or encourage to do more over email. It's not like it's A LOT of business, so I could easily accommodate myself I suppose. ::sigh:: I am going to just have to receive company at home if I want company.
This will be completely worth it after this 6 weeks. Well, I hope so. lol We'll see. I hope Gary and Gilbert will be ok with me not picking them up for a while. Dan will have extra cat duties for a while.
So I am glad I am ok, glad the best worked out, and happy to be here. Yay! I am going to make myself a "high fiber" breakfast. The doc ordered "high fiber" everything for now on. So oatmeal it is this morning. Yummy.
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Having Surgery Today...
So I am having surgery today. Supposed to be a routine out patient thing, with a possible over night depending on what they find inside me. Oh Joy! I am hoping this will be the answer to the problems I've been having. The ultrasound revealed masses.... 2 of them around my one remaining ovary, totaling in size about 8 cm. Not as big as my last one, which that doctor explained it as the size of a grapefruit which wrapped around my Fallopian tube and killed that ovary by strangulation. Like I said, oh joy! So when I started to have the same symptoms as last time, I wanted to make sure we got on it.... as much as you can when you have health insurance, then you DON'T have health insurance, then you HAVE it again. (long frustrating story) So these 2 masses definitely worry me, being that it appears they have my last remaining ovary surrounded like Santa Anna's army at the Alamo... and we know how that turned out.
Now there is a newly discovered mass in my uterus, that is almost 3 cm. I had an ultrasound in May, the mass was not there. Had an ultrasound in July.... mass is there. So one would go for the obvious, the possibility of being pregnant. But remember, my ovary is surrounded by a 8 cm army of cystic tissue creating a secure offensive front, and my ovary is the size of a small almond.... the odds weren't good. However, the doctor felt we needed to run more tests to make SURE I wasn't pregnant.... like peeing on a stick, then a blood test. I explained to the doctor I know for certain I am not pregnant, because certain activities must occur for that to happen and in my current condition.... well..... But no, we had to do more tests. So now that I am officially "Pregnant Negative" (like I knew I was) what the heck is this thing in my uterus? This is what may cause my overnight visit, I am certain.
I have had some long deep thoughts about this surgery the possible outcomes that may happen. Here it goes:
1. The Best of the Best Outcome: The ovarian and uterine masses are removed and all is well
This is the ideal outcome. Keeping my ovary, the God given hormones I was created with and the possibility of reproduction if I ever wanted to. We ride off into the sunset and everyone is happy.
2. Quasi Best of the Best Outcome: Hysterectomy.
This I can cope with, however, would my loving husband? The early menopause, the hot flashes, etc. Would I regret not having children? Eh, I can live with that. But the adjustment from hormonal woman, to old lady worries me tremendously. I already had to adjust from 2 ovaries to 1 ovary and I know how hard THAT was on our marriage! Yikes! Dan is a trooper, but we must be prepared for this scenario.
3. Sucks, but Ok: Death.
Do I worry that I may die in the surgery? Sure, but death is something I can live with.... (would that be an oxymoron?) Would I miss friends, family, loved ones? Actually I wouldn't because the dead is conscience of nothing at all. (Ec 9:5) But I would worry that family and friends would miss me. I am sure I am such a glowing light of fun and excitement that they could never live without me. Not really, lol. But I know from my experiences with death is that it hurts. It hurts something awful, like your heart can't breath as it is, then a fat man comes along and decides to sit on your chest and laugh in your face. Well, maybe it's not the same for everyone, but that is how it is for me. I would not want anyone to feel like that, ever. But such is life - meaning, also, such is death. And I can think of worse things to put my family and friends through than death.
4. Worst of the Worst: Cancer.
I could think of absolutely nothing worse in the world to have to fight. Both of my husband's parents lost the battle to cancer in very, VERY, different ways. Dan and I were caregivers for both while they went through their fights (at the same time mind you), and it was hard. Sure it was tough driving his dad to chemo treatments to Detroit twice a week. Tough making sure he ate correctly, making sure he took his meds correctly, making sure he didn't blow up the house when he lit up his cigarettes while using his oxygen machine. It was even tough to watch 2 competent people become dependent on us even for the most simple things. ::sigh:: Believe it or not, that was the easy stuff.
Watching Dan's mother die after one chemo treatment was the worst. Watching this woman filled with life, filled with hope, filled with confidence because she had the 98% curable "good cancer," to watch this woman be poisoned by some doctor's over estimating the chemicals to put in her body, that was the worst. Watching her slowly die as one by one each organ system shut down in her body, watching her slowly suffer this death was agonizing for me. I can't even imagine how it must have felt for her children watching on, or her husband that couldn't bare to go to the hospital, or how it felt when her grandchildren came to visit and she could no longer speak to them. I can't image how it felt for Gabrielle and Gwyneth. Yes, this is worse than death. This is the worst of the worst - the slow and degrading pain of cancer. I could never put my husband though that again. It would hurt him too much to see that again, especially if I was the object of the cancer this time.
So deep breath here and let's bring this conversation back full circle and leave this segment on a happier note. Whatever happens today, I am ready for it. I may not be as brave as Davy Crockett going up against Santa Anna at the Alamo, I may not be so positive as he was, but Davy's outcome may certainly be mine today. Am I taking about my last ovary or death here? lol I'm not even sure anymore. But I am ok with either outcome. Is that a happier note? lol
I will leave this article expressing all my love. I love my family, I love my husband, Dan and especially love Gabrielle and Gwyneth. I love them no matter what. For if you don't love, what makes all this crap worth it?
Love Always,
Stacy
Now there is a newly discovered mass in my uterus, that is almost 3 cm. I had an ultrasound in May, the mass was not there. Had an ultrasound in July.... mass is there. So one would go for the obvious, the possibility of being pregnant. But remember, my ovary is surrounded by a 8 cm army of cystic tissue creating a secure offensive front, and my ovary is the size of a small almond.... the odds weren't good. However, the doctor felt we needed to run more tests to make SURE I wasn't pregnant.... like peeing on a stick, then a blood test. I explained to the doctor I know for certain I am not pregnant, because certain activities must occur for that to happen and in my current condition.... well..... But no, we had to do more tests. So now that I am officially "Pregnant Negative" (like I knew I was) what the heck is this thing in my uterus? This is what may cause my overnight visit, I am certain.
I have had some long deep thoughts about this surgery the possible outcomes that may happen. Here it goes:
1. The Best of the Best Outcome: The ovarian and uterine masses are removed and all is well
This is the ideal outcome. Keeping my ovary, the God given hormones I was created with and the possibility of reproduction if I ever wanted to. We ride off into the sunset and everyone is happy.
2. Quasi Best of the Best Outcome: Hysterectomy.
This I can cope with, however, would my loving husband? The early menopause, the hot flashes, etc. Would I regret not having children? Eh, I can live with that. But the adjustment from hormonal woman, to old lady worries me tremendously. I already had to adjust from 2 ovaries to 1 ovary and I know how hard THAT was on our marriage! Yikes! Dan is a trooper, but we must be prepared for this scenario.
3. Sucks, but Ok: Death.
Do I worry that I may die in the surgery? Sure, but death is something I can live with.... (would that be an oxymoron?) Would I miss friends, family, loved ones? Actually I wouldn't because the dead is conscience of nothing at all. (Ec 9:5) But I would worry that family and friends would miss me. I am sure I am such a glowing light of fun and excitement that they could never live without me. Not really, lol. But I know from my experiences with death is that it hurts. It hurts something awful, like your heart can't breath as it is, then a fat man comes along and decides to sit on your chest and laugh in your face. Well, maybe it's not the same for everyone, but that is how it is for me. I would not want anyone to feel like that, ever. But such is life - meaning, also, such is death. And I can think of worse things to put my family and friends through than death.
4. Worst of the Worst: Cancer.
I could think of absolutely nothing worse in the world to have to fight. Both of my husband's parents lost the battle to cancer in very, VERY, different ways. Dan and I were caregivers for both while they went through their fights (at the same time mind you), and it was hard. Sure it was tough driving his dad to chemo treatments to Detroit twice a week. Tough making sure he ate correctly, making sure he took his meds correctly, making sure he didn't blow up the house when he lit up his cigarettes while using his oxygen machine. It was even tough to watch 2 competent people become dependent on us even for the most simple things. ::sigh:: Believe it or not, that was the easy stuff.
Watching Dan's mother die after one chemo treatment was the worst. Watching this woman filled with life, filled with hope, filled with confidence because she had the 98% curable "good cancer," to watch this woman be poisoned by some doctor's over estimating the chemicals to put in her body, that was the worst. Watching her slowly die as one by one each organ system shut down in her body, watching her slowly suffer this death was agonizing for me. I can't even imagine how it must have felt for her children watching on, or her husband that couldn't bare to go to the hospital, or how it felt when her grandchildren came to visit and she could no longer speak to them. I can't image how it felt for Gabrielle and Gwyneth. Yes, this is worse than death. This is the worst of the worst - the slow and degrading pain of cancer. I could never put my husband though that again. It would hurt him too much to see that again, especially if I was the object of the cancer this time.
So deep breath here and let's bring this conversation back full circle and leave this segment on a happier note. Whatever happens today, I am ready for it. I may not be as brave as Davy Crockett going up against Santa Anna at the Alamo, I may not be so positive as he was, but Davy's outcome may certainly be mine today. Am I taking about my last ovary or death here? lol I'm not even sure anymore. But I am ok with either outcome. Is that a happier note? lol
I will leave this article expressing all my love. I love my family, I love my husband, Dan and especially love Gabrielle and Gwyneth. I love them no matter what. For if you don't love, what makes all this crap worth it?
Love Always,
Stacy
Monday, August 1, 2011
Deep Reflection of Loyal Cats
So I have been in deep reflection today. I realized that I now have been blogging for a year about our crazy cats. When I started doing this blog, I wasn't expecting a huge following, or even hope to make money from it. It has been a creative outlet in which to express myself. Honestly, this past year was tough, financially, emotionally, among other things. Blogging about these cats has brought a bit of humor into a life that has been less than happy this past year.
I truly adore my husband and our pets. These relationships keep me motivated when the bad days seem to bare down on us. Gary & Gilbert don't quite fill the deep hole that was left from last summer, but they are distracting enough to make life bearable, loving enough to crack a smile, and loyal to us in a way I will never understand. They are truly good company.
Blogging has allowed me to focus on happy thoughts, the littler things in life that sometimes gets over looked when chaos is pounding at your door. I'm not 100% sure if my few followers enjoy my stories, or even find the humor or sarcasm behind stories. But I know I have appreciated the opportunity to express myself and having an arena to do it in. So being in deep reflection today, I had to find the perfect picture to express my thoughts. Enjoy.
I truly adore my husband and our pets. These relationships keep me motivated when the bad days seem to bare down on us. Gary & Gilbert don't quite fill the deep hole that was left from last summer, but they are distracting enough to make life bearable, loving enough to crack a smile, and loyal to us in a way I will never understand. They are truly good company.
Blogging has allowed me to focus on happy thoughts, the littler things in life that sometimes gets over looked when chaos is pounding at your door. I'm not 100% sure if my few followers enjoy my stories, or even find the humor or sarcasm behind stories. But I know I have appreciated the opportunity to express myself and having an arena to do it in. So being in deep reflection today, I had to find the perfect picture to express my thoughts. Enjoy.
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